I landed on Tuesday night. My friend had misread my text and thought I was arriving on wed. She zoomed to the airport from the Quarter in lightning time. We headed to the house where I was staying south of the Garden District before dropping me off in the Marigny to meet Athena (I dance with her in STL) & her friend Ben that does fire. They wanted me to do a bit of fans & torches for a small crowd at a bar, Hi-Ho, for a website promo party. I was lucky enough to met up with 2 friends from Providence, RI I hadn't seen in 4 years. A tattooer friend from Portland, in town to work at Electric Ladyland Tattoo, also showed up for a drink. I did a quick set of torches with white gas (only a little bit of fleshing, cause white gas hurts and i've been know to burn-to scar) and fans. People in NOLA rarely see fire performers & this small crowd loved it. I tried to show Ben how to tunnel outside after the show. He said I was crazy for holding fire in my mouth that long. He would die if he ever saw Wake Angel or Gwen tunnel. They fuckin' kill it.
The house I was staying at is rented by 2 of my sister's former co-workers from the Hustler Hollywood store on Bourbon, Ann & Kenny. My sister was the lingerie and shoe ware buyer for them for a few years before Katrina. Ann and I had breakfast & caught up before she left later that day to spend the week with her man on the east coast. I would have the house to myself until Kenny arrived on Friday night. I killed some time going to Wal-Mart for fire fuel (white gas is $7 a gal, not $10!) and some groceries. I went for the 2 mi walk from the Irish Channel neighborhood north to St. Charles Ave. on my way to the French Quarter. I stopped at one of my favorite places on Magazine St., Juan's Flying Burrito. I had dinner at the bar between a tattooed dude who just got his chest done by ELT the day before, and an older, white collar gentleman named Matt who 'wanted to take pin-up photography' of me before I left on tue. He was gonna pay me, and I really did want to, but no dice with my busy week. He had two cute dogs. I got to the club around 9pm. My girl Michel, from STL works as the hospitality manager there. Libby one of the GM's, and Josh the MC from STL were working there for the week, too. It's really the reason I work at Barely Legal, instead of the Hustler Club. Barely is also the cleanest club on Bourbon Street. No touching the girls on stage, not touching during lap dances, almost anything goes in rooms as long as you keep your panties on. Apparently, there are a lot of 'whore houses' on the strip, but all of the clubs are topless only. Go figure. I got the tour when I was done filling out my contract, ($30 stage fee if I worked more than 8 hour shifts, not on schedule) taking my sweet time getting ready to be on the floor when I don't have to be at 10 pm.
Barely Legal is in the middle of Bourbon St. across from a dirty club named Lipstixxx and next to a stripper clothing store Panda Bear, a closet sized room that sells cheap shots and a Little Darlings, also super dirty. You enter through a lobby with a counter to pay the $15 to get in, and $30 for a VIP wristbands. The main room behind two printed doors with 2 innocent looking blond co-eds on it, is a decent sized room seating for 100+ with a huge main "Sugar" stage with 2 spinning poles about 15' tall. There is a 2nd back bar area with the smaller "Spice" stage, behind is a patio that boasts the only outdoor pool in the Quarter during the summer. They have 4 beds for Cabana dances and a Tiki bar. Adjacent to the stage is a dance room with about 12 couches. Each couch has these black towers with buttons. You are issued a magnetic key that you wave across a reader. "Hello Lark" it says on the tiny screen, and asks you to feed money to the vending machine slot. Lights will turn green when the dance starts and blinks red when it's done 3 minutes later. Couch dances are $40 (house keeps $10), Table dances out on the floor are $20 (all yours), but you have to time those. This is amazing to me. No counting songs like in PDX, no bouncers counting dances like in STL, a machine does it for you and keeps track of your money that you get at the end of the night when you cash out. There is an elevator that goes up to the VIP 2nd floor. The "Playground" stage has a 8' spinning pole, 2 ladders of monkey bars in the ceilings and 2 trapeze bars to swing on at each end. There is a 2nd bar, and seating for 50+. There is also the balcony that you can look out onto Bourbon St. and throw beads at all the morons. This is where the Champagne, (sic) 'Dorm Rooms' are too. Ah, the glorious champagne rooms. They sell a lot of these here, ranging from $585 to $8,000. 7 of them, all of varying decor and bottles. The entire club has a 'University/College girls theme' it's cute but still a lil' skeezy. They use to call them 'Bedrooms' but changed the decor to more of a 19+ look, instead of an under 15 look, ew. I obviously look much older than that, (and am the only girl covered in tattoos) but apparently don't look as old as I really am. "You're... 23!" Cool, I'll take it! There is also another row of dance couches with the black 'vending' towers upstairs.
Wed night was horribly slow. More girls than customers, $50 gross. I didn't care how much I was making because when I travel, any money I make pays for my plane tickets and cost of living while in the city. Besides, I was in New Orleans, life is grand! I was suppose to do 8 hours, but if there isn't enough customers downstairs, they bring everyone upstairs for VIP access, until they feel like they're done drinking and leave. I watched a thick Latino girl convince a younger staggering drunk dude that he needed a $585 room. After their 30 min was up, he sat in the corner nodding off, until he got kicked out. Poor bastard. I have great difficulty, as a person, to convince people of things they don't want. I am totally in the wrong industry!
Around 6 am, we were done and I decided to walk home. I can never justify getting a cab, unless I have other people with me. There's something about the city at that time in the morning and I wanted to explore. I carry pepper spray and a hunting knife, so I was prepared if I got fucked with.
If you've never been to Bourbon Street, you don't know the filth level it is capable of. At it's busiest, you are literally wading through all the plastic and styrofoam cups, dropped clothing, paper trash, urine, & throw-up wall to wall on Bourbon. It is one of the most disgusting places. You're shocked if you happen to see a dumb girl walking barefoot, because "her feet hurt" from heels, or happen upon a child. Why is there a child here?! Around 5 am, they wash the entire street. Starting from Canal, they have 3 or more street sweepers, 5-10 guys with power washers and brooms going about 10 blocks. It's crazy. (During Mardi Gras this clean up entourage is tripled but escorted by a herd of horse cops, patrol cars, and about 30 riot cops leading the pack. That is one of the craziest things I've ever seen, they shut the street down at exactly 4am) I dodge the rolling cups and spray of disinfectant to make it out of the Quarter onto Canal. It takes about an hour to walk the 2 miles. I don't mind the time, because the scenery is amazing and all the people greeting me "good morning". The most dangerous thing I encountered on the 3 walks home I took, was a wild pack of family cats and their raccoon leader. We had a stare down, until I crossed the street to avoid that little bastard. I was in bed at 8 am after some cereal.
I usually try to wake up as late as possible mornings after work, but with a 2 hour time difference I was awake at 9 am PST. Damn it! Tried for another few hours, but got a text from Athena to come to Country Club. It's a gay friendly nude pool and hot tub in the Marigny. I had never been, but knew all about it. I took a cab there, only because I was gonna be there later than them, and I needed to lug my fire tools, fuel can and suitcase of costumes to the club.
Country Club is a big beautiful, yellow house with a restaurant and bar in it. The pool is $10 a day. I walked out to about 20 or so (mostly) naked men & women. I love me some naked ladies (of course, because I stare at them for hours at work) but naked men....ehhhh.. I only like certain sizes and shapes of those, and they were keeping their shorts on. The group of 9 of us all went back to Athena's new place in the Marigny. I am shocked at how cheap rent is, but I guess there's hurricanes, shootings and robberies all the time. Oh, yeah. We cooked a massive meal, drank and I got dropped off at Barely for Taboo Thursday. It's like a fetish/kink night, there was whips, chains, ropes and I did some fire. I decided to not wear my wig while doing fire on a new stage. So I rocked my shorter curly hair, rather than my longer straight (plastic) hair. I dressed in my Black Milk R2D2 onesie. Only a few nerds knew what it was. While talking to the one man I talked to the entire night that I thought would have some cash, in between him telling me he hasn't had sex in 6 months and buys prostitutes and his daughters this, and his ex-wife that, he asked if I was new because I wasn't wearing a bikini. "No, it's a costume... see it's R2D2?" Good lord. I left with $75. That included one $20 table dance for the larger women being led by a collar after she balked at the $40 price tag of a couch dance, and stage money from my fire set. baahhhh... Another hour walk home, cereal & 5 hours of sleep.
Fiona (dances in STL) would be in town, and Kenny late at night on Friday. I met Fiona for drinks with a few of her friends, and then went across the street to eat some food with a buddy from my hometown who manages Angeli. They have amazing sandwiches, and I hadn't seen Alex in a few years. He was a good friend of my brothers' but they had a falling out. Backstory: I don't speak to my brother anymore. He lives in New Orleans, so I was also spending a lot of effort dodging him. But I wanted to see our shared friends, so he can go fuck himself. I spent about an hour with Alex, & headed to work. Friday was also another slow one, too many girls, and the crowds pacing themselves for a 4 day weekend. I did another fire fans & torches show, people freaked out, and it was the only money I made all night. I did win 3rd place in the Best Pole Trick Competition. The girl who won was incredible. Tiny, super athletic black girl from New York named Tiger. I wanted to make her my wife. She had this amazing triangle shape ripped back and a tiny round butt she could snap back & forth when she walked. I got a ribbon, a drink and 10 points. In Larry Flynt's clubs, you get point cards to redeem for free rent (stage fee). You get points for doing theme sets, covering a set for a dancer, doing contests, & selling champagne. I always try to do at least 1 10 point theme set a night. The staff loves them because girls don't really do them. With Sinferno, it's kinda my thing.
Got back to the house around 8am. I had taken the street car on St. Charles home 1 mi. of the way the last 2 nights. I love the streetcar, rickety, cheap, loud piece of historical public transportation. I was beat when I got on & always sit in the front. The streetcar's hum will stop when waiting for traffic lights. They run like the ones in SF. At a stop, the driver headed to the back and scolded a kid "Boy, you better put those feet down off my chairs and quit disrespecting my car, you best put that food away too, or you can walk to where you goin'." About 1/2 a mile later he jumped out at a stop to run into the BK and get a carton of OJ. "I'll be right back, ya'll" Ah, the south. It just functions differently down here.
I ate turtle soup on Saturday at Mandina's on Canal. It was amazing. Like shrimp, octopus and halibut all rolled into one. The Server was a woman of about 65, and called me baby girl every time she said something to me. "Would you like some sherry in that soup, baby girl?" "Fully dressed on that po' boy, baby girl?" I loved it. Headed into the Quarter to make a tattoo appointment at Electric Ladyland Tattoo, bullshit with Eli (from Blacklist, but working at ELT for the week) for a minute, and got a drink with another of my siblings & I's mutual friend's at Pravda on Decatur. Ran into Fiona & friends before I dipped out to hit up Cafe' du Monde for Beignets and cafe' au lait. I had such a smile on my face dodging tourists and traffic, eating the delicious fried, raised cakes doused in a cup of powdered sugar spilling down my hoodie, sipping my coffee in styrofoam. I turn onto to Bourbon the block before the club, and it's packed full with tourists in amazing costumes. Saturday night was gonna be it, I could feel it. I had the best fire show of all the nights I did them. The managers had been taking photos for the website, but wanted to video that night because I was gonna do poi. It was rad, I think they're gonna put it on the Barely Legal YouTube :D I was selling dances too, just a few, but enough to stop being discouraged about selling none the past 3 nights. Michel & Josh would clue me in on potential money havers and when Josh called me over to meet a bachelor party dressed in those cheap banana costumes. "Lark is from the north, up in Portland" "Cool, we're from Michigan." "Whoa, I'm originally from Michigan!" I chatted it up with 2 of them about my hometown, knowing a few of the same people, and poured myself a drink from their bottle service of Grey Goose ($300). The bachelor bought a dance for the cute, young one with a sandy trimmed beard. We were on the couch and he started touching my sides a bit. "Sorry Hon', you can't touch me on the couches." "Really? Sorry." "Yeah, it's the rules. You can touch me in the rooms, though." "Ok, lets get a room" YES! We got a tour of 2 rooms from Michel before he immediately settled on the one with the big circle couch, after not asking about the price. It's an hour, $1,600 room with a bottle of Veuve Clicquot Rose'. It was awesome, he is a 30 year old, fit, Jewish lawyer living in Chicago, we talked about being from Michigan, riding motorcycles, I told him that he had just paid for my most recent repair from my crash. "Will you rub my back?" yes. "Can I pour champagne on your back and lick it off?" yes. This guy was super hot, and that's what he was paying for. I won't do anything dirtier than that. All 3 of them I've ever sold, have been to people who have asked me. It was their idea, they wanted to spend the money. I don't try to sell them like I sell dances. I'll do a dance for (almost) anyone, I'm yet to say no to someone for a lap dance in all my 20 months of doing this. The 3 rooms have been to 2 young, hot kids who have money, and a 35 year old who just wanted to talk. The kids are ones with that bad girl fantasy, because I prolly wouldn't cross paths with them in public. It starts with a dance or two, then turns into an hour or 2 1/2 of rooms. I love being able to meet these kids and hang out. They think I'm faking wanting to spend the time with them and have some drinks, but it's a much better treat. I don't have to lower my standards to force sell them on gross/old dudes, that wouldn't want to talk to some mouthy, tattooed broad anyways. I made $865 that night. The dancer that drove me home told me the story of her regular buying her an $11,000 Xterra. It had a smashed bumper from her texting and driving. I had to tell her she had a green light twice, because she was busy texting.
Sunday was my last night of work. My sister was making an impromptu 15 hour road trip from Miami Beach to see me for Halloween day then see me off on Tuesday. We have 'our things we go do' when we're both in NOLA, and I love her to death. At work, I sold 3 dances to a party of 6, who totally dug me. Another for a hot girl dressed as Daphne from Scooby Doo. Then did my last fire show, and got some photos taken from it for the website. Fiona & Athena were in the $4000 room with a man, and I kept sneaking in, chatting and drinking their Krug White Label and Pierre Jouet. After I did one last dance for another hot chick with huge boobs, Michel flagged me down. "They bought you for an hour, here's $500 Barely bucks." (paper money redeemable for cash at check-out) The $4000 room had added me. YES! I went and hung with Fiona, Athena and Tony from Eastern Oregon, we made out way through another 4 bottles of champagne, some crappy breakfast delivery and did a mini-fire show for them in the room, with just some torches. "Hey Michel, can I do fire in here?" "Sure, just don't burn the building down". Afterwards Josh asked me to do one more torch show on VIP upstairs after they had brought the after hours customers up there. I sold one more dance, and left with another $860. Our adorable cocktail waitress dropped me off at home. She was the best confidence booster all week, and made me feel like I was really cool.
I napped on the couch until my sister arrived at 9am. We hadn't seen each other since Aug. of 2010, in New Orleans. We chatted for a bit and went to bed. I missed the crap out of her. In the morning we went to eat delicious food at Cochon with Kenny, Fiona and friends. The 4 of us hadn't been together in over 6 years. We stopped by Fifi Mahony's and I bought 2 new wigs, 1 blonde wig and 1 auburn, with purple and burgundy low lights. Look out St. Louis, I'm blonde now, bitches! I got dropped off for my massive Fleur de Lis knee tattoo done by Lester at ELT. Later I dressed up as Dr. Rockzo and ran around the Quarter and Frenchman until a 5 am bedtime. Earlier in the day, I had stopped by the club and asked if I could come in and do one last fire set at 1:30 am for my 3 friends, sister included, that hadn't seen me perform before. It was no problem, as I was on "I can do whatever I want" status. I guess nightly fire shows, and making the club $2,000 in dances and rooms will do that. We all rolled in about 1am, I changed into Freddie Mercury and did my Queen set. They flipped out, I was so happy that my sister loved it. It's really important to me that she thinks I'm awesome, as a former dancer herself. Now if only I could get my mom to see me do my thang...
On Tuesday we went to Port of Call for super alcoholic Monsoons' and then off to the airport all buzzed, I went.
I saw all the people I love who live in that city, made my dollar goal and had an amazing vacation. I love my trips so much because they're so different than dancing at home. I wrote some of this blog at one of my clubs from 3pm - 9pm (mid shift, only ones I can get mostly) where there are close to 20 males filling the bar at close to 5pm on a Wednesday. If I left the dressing room and ask every one of them for a dance, they would all say no. They can only afford their cheap drinks. It doesn't even occur to them that they need to tip us, or even draw away from their conversations to pay attention to the fact this is a strip club. 90% of clubs in this city are like this. To keep my mood stable I treat dancing here like play time. I can hone my pole skills being on stage 10-14 times a shift, instead of 4-6. There isn't an emphasis on 'rack interactions' with customers like in STL & NOLA. I barely have time to do pole tricks because I'm busy putting my boobs in people faces and doing that move where you hook their neck with your ankle and shove their face in your but-thigh area. They won't tip you, if you don't do these things there. In PDX they have to tip you, a measly $1 a song. I'm finding it difficult to get back into the groove here. I'm doing 3 times the work on stage to show my vag for 1/10th of the money.
I sure could use another hot, rich lawyer & one of those $1,600 Veuve Rose' rooms right about now.
Lark will be back in St. Louis at Hustler Club Nov. 9th-13th. Please keep voting for her in the PDX Strippes for 'Most Beautiful Face' until Nov 25th.
The house I was staying at is rented by 2 of my sister's former co-workers from the Hustler Hollywood store on Bourbon, Ann & Kenny. My sister was the lingerie and shoe ware buyer for them for a few years before Katrina. Ann and I had breakfast & caught up before she left later that day to spend the week with her man on the east coast. I would have the house to myself until Kenny arrived on Friday night. I killed some time going to Wal-Mart for fire fuel (white gas is $7 a gal, not $10!) and some groceries. I went for the 2 mi walk from the Irish Channel neighborhood north to St. Charles Ave. on my way to the French Quarter. I stopped at one of my favorite places on Magazine St., Juan's Flying Burrito. I had dinner at the bar between a tattooed dude who just got his chest done by ELT the day before, and an older, white collar gentleman named Matt who 'wanted to take pin-up photography' of me before I left on tue. He was gonna pay me, and I really did want to, but no dice with my busy week. He had two cute dogs. I got to the club around 9pm. My girl Michel, from STL works as the hospitality manager there. Libby one of the GM's, and Josh the MC from STL were working there for the week, too. It's really the reason I work at Barely Legal, instead of the Hustler Club. Barely is also the cleanest club on Bourbon Street. No touching the girls on stage, not touching during lap dances, almost anything goes in rooms as long as you keep your panties on. Apparently, there are a lot of 'whore houses' on the strip, but all of the clubs are topless only. Go figure. I got the tour when I was done filling out my contract, ($30 stage fee if I worked more than 8 hour shifts, not on schedule) taking my sweet time getting ready to be on the floor when I don't have to be at 10 pm.
Barely Legal is in the middle of Bourbon St. across from a dirty club named Lipstixxx and next to a stripper clothing store Panda Bear, a closet sized room that sells cheap shots and a Little Darlings, also super dirty. You enter through a lobby with a counter to pay the $15 to get in, and $30 for a VIP wristbands. The main room behind two printed doors with 2 innocent looking blond co-eds on it, is a decent sized room seating for 100+ with a huge main "Sugar" stage with 2 spinning poles about 15' tall. There is a 2nd back bar area with the smaller "Spice" stage, behind is a patio that boasts the only outdoor pool in the Quarter during the summer. They have 4 beds for Cabana dances and a Tiki bar. Adjacent to the stage is a dance room with about 12 couches. Each couch has these black towers with buttons. You are issued a magnetic key that you wave across a reader. "Hello Lark" it says on the tiny screen, and asks you to feed money to the vending machine slot. Lights will turn green when the dance starts and blinks red when it's done 3 minutes later. Couch dances are $40 (house keeps $10), Table dances out on the floor are $20 (all yours), but you have to time those. This is amazing to me. No counting songs like in PDX, no bouncers counting dances like in STL, a machine does it for you and keeps track of your money that you get at the end of the night when you cash out. There is an elevator that goes up to the VIP 2nd floor. The "Playground" stage has a 8' spinning pole, 2 ladders of monkey bars in the ceilings and 2 trapeze bars to swing on at each end. There is a 2nd bar, and seating for 50+. There is also the balcony that you can look out onto Bourbon St. and throw beads at all the morons. This is where the Champagne, (sic) 'Dorm Rooms' are too. Ah, the glorious champagne rooms. They sell a lot of these here, ranging from $585 to $8,000. 7 of them, all of varying decor and bottles. The entire club has a 'University/College girls theme' it's cute but still a lil' skeezy. They use to call them 'Bedrooms' but changed the decor to more of a 19+ look, instead of an under 15 look, ew. I obviously look much older than that, (and am the only girl covered in tattoos) but apparently don't look as old as I really am. "You're... 23!" Cool, I'll take it! There is also another row of dance couches with the black 'vending' towers upstairs.
Wed night was horribly slow. More girls than customers, $50 gross. I didn't care how much I was making because when I travel, any money I make pays for my plane tickets and cost of living while in the city. Besides, I was in New Orleans, life is grand! I was suppose to do 8 hours, but if there isn't enough customers downstairs, they bring everyone upstairs for VIP access, until they feel like they're done drinking and leave. I watched a thick Latino girl convince a younger staggering drunk dude that he needed a $585 room. After their 30 min was up, he sat in the corner nodding off, until he got kicked out. Poor bastard. I have great difficulty, as a person, to convince people of things they don't want. I am totally in the wrong industry!
Around 6 am, we were done and I decided to walk home. I can never justify getting a cab, unless I have other people with me. There's something about the city at that time in the morning and I wanted to explore. I carry pepper spray and a hunting knife, so I was prepared if I got fucked with.
If you've never been to Bourbon Street, you don't know the filth level it is capable of. At it's busiest, you are literally wading through all the plastic and styrofoam cups, dropped clothing, paper trash, urine, & throw-up wall to wall on Bourbon. It is one of the most disgusting places. You're shocked if you happen to see a dumb girl walking barefoot, because "her feet hurt" from heels, or happen upon a child. Why is there a child here?! Around 5 am, they wash the entire street. Starting from Canal, they have 3 or more street sweepers, 5-10 guys with power washers and brooms going about 10 blocks. It's crazy. (During Mardi Gras this clean up entourage is tripled but escorted by a herd of horse cops, patrol cars, and about 30 riot cops leading the pack. That is one of the craziest things I've ever seen, they shut the street down at exactly 4am) I dodge the rolling cups and spray of disinfectant to make it out of the Quarter onto Canal. It takes about an hour to walk the 2 miles. I don't mind the time, because the scenery is amazing and all the people greeting me "good morning". The most dangerous thing I encountered on the 3 walks home I took, was a wild pack of family cats and their raccoon leader. We had a stare down, until I crossed the street to avoid that little bastard. I was in bed at 8 am after some cereal.
I usually try to wake up as late as possible mornings after work, but with a 2 hour time difference I was awake at 9 am PST. Damn it! Tried for another few hours, but got a text from Athena to come to Country Club. It's a gay friendly nude pool and hot tub in the Marigny. I had never been, but knew all about it. I took a cab there, only because I was gonna be there later than them, and I needed to lug my fire tools, fuel can and suitcase of costumes to the club.
Country Club is a big beautiful, yellow house with a restaurant and bar in it. The pool is $10 a day. I walked out to about 20 or so (mostly) naked men & women. I love me some naked ladies (of course, because I stare at them for hours at work) but naked men....ehhhh.. I only like certain sizes and shapes of those, and they were keeping their shorts on. The group of 9 of us all went back to Athena's new place in the Marigny. I am shocked at how cheap rent is, but I guess there's hurricanes, shootings and robberies all the time. Oh, yeah. We cooked a massive meal, drank and I got dropped off at Barely for Taboo Thursday. It's like a fetish/kink night, there was whips, chains, ropes and I did some fire. I decided to not wear my wig while doing fire on a new stage. So I rocked my shorter curly hair, rather than my longer straight (plastic) hair. I dressed in my Black Milk R2D2 onesie. Only a few nerds knew what it was. While talking to the one man I talked to the entire night that I thought would have some cash, in between him telling me he hasn't had sex in 6 months and buys prostitutes and his daughters this, and his ex-wife that, he asked if I was new because I wasn't wearing a bikini. "No, it's a costume... see it's R2D2?" Good lord. I left with $75. That included one $20 table dance for the larger women being led by a collar after she balked at the $40 price tag of a couch dance, and stage money from my fire set. baahhhh... Another hour walk home, cereal & 5 hours of sleep.
Fiona (dances in STL) would be in town, and Kenny late at night on Friday. I met Fiona for drinks with a few of her friends, and then went across the street to eat some food with a buddy from my hometown who manages Angeli. They have amazing sandwiches, and I hadn't seen Alex in a few years. He was a good friend of my brothers' but they had a falling out. Backstory: I don't speak to my brother anymore. He lives in New Orleans, so I was also spending a lot of effort dodging him. But I wanted to see our shared friends, so he can go fuck himself. I spent about an hour with Alex, & headed to work. Friday was also another slow one, too many girls, and the crowds pacing themselves for a 4 day weekend. I did another fire fans & torches show, people freaked out, and it was the only money I made all night. I did win 3rd place in the Best Pole Trick Competition. The girl who won was incredible. Tiny, super athletic black girl from New York named Tiger. I wanted to make her my wife. She had this amazing triangle shape ripped back and a tiny round butt she could snap back & forth when she walked. I got a ribbon, a drink and 10 points. In Larry Flynt's clubs, you get point cards to redeem for free rent (stage fee). You get points for doing theme sets, covering a set for a dancer, doing contests, & selling champagne. I always try to do at least 1 10 point theme set a night. The staff loves them because girls don't really do them. With Sinferno, it's kinda my thing.
Got back to the house around 8am. I had taken the street car on St. Charles home 1 mi. of the way the last 2 nights. I love the streetcar, rickety, cheap, loud piece of historical public transportation. I was beat when I got on & always sit in the front. The streetcar's hum will stop when waiting for traffic lights. They run like the ones in SF. At a stop, the driver headed to the back and scolded a kid "Boy, you better put those feet down off my chairs and quit disrespecting my car, you best put that food away too, or you can walk to where you goin'." About 1/2 a mile later he jumped out at a stop to run into the BK and get a carton of OJ. "I'll be right back, ya'll" Ah, the south. It just functions differently down here.
I ate turtle soup on Saturday at Mandina's on Canal. It was amazing. Like shrimp, octopus and halibut all rolled into one. The Server was a woman of about 65, and called me baby girl every time she said something to me. "Would you like some sherry in that soup, baby girl?" "Fully dressed on that po' boy, baby girl?" I loved it. Headed into the Quarter to make a tattoo appointment at Electric Ladyland Tattoo, bullshit with Eli (from Blacklist, but working at ELT for the week) for a minute, and got a drink with another of my siblings & I's mutual friend's at Pravda on Decatur. Ran into Fiona & friends before I dipped out to hit up Cafe' du Monde for Beignets and cafe' au lait. I had such a smile on my face dodging tourists and traffic, eating the delicious fried, raised cakes doused in a cup of powdered sugar spilling down my hoodie, sipping my coffee in styrofoam. I turn onto to Bourbon the block before the club, and it's packed full with tourists in amazing costumes. Saturday night was gonna be it, I could feel it. I had the best fire show of all the nights I did them. The managers had been taking photos for the website, but wanted to video that night because I was gonna do poi. It was rad, I think they're gonna put it on the Barely Legal YouTube :D I was selling dances too, just a few, but enough to stop being discouraged about selling none the past 3 nights. Michel & Josh would clue me in on potential money havers and when Josh called me over to meet a bachelor party dressed in those cheap banana costumes. "Lark is from the north, up in Portland" "Cool, we're from Michigan." "Whoa, I'm originally from Michigan!" I chatted it up with 2 of them about my hometown, knowing a few of the same people, and poured myself a drink from their bottle service of Grey Goose ($300). The bachelor bought a dance for the cute, young one with a sandy trimmed beard. We were on the couch and he started touching my sides a bit. "Sorry Hon', you can't touch me on the couches." "Really? Sorry." "Yeah, it's the rules. You can touch me in the rooms, though." "Ok, lets get a room" YES! We got a tour of 2 rooms from Michel before he immediately settled on the one with the big circle couch, after not asking about the price. It's an hour, $1,600 room with a bottle of Veuve Clicquot Rose'. It was awesome, he is a 30 year old, fit, Jewish lawyer living in Chicago, we talked about being from Michigan, riding motorcycles, I told him that he had just paid for my most recent repair from my crash. "Will you rub my back?" yes. "Can I pour champagne on your back and lick it off?" yes. This guy was super hot, and that's what he was paying for. I won't do anything dirtier than that. All 3 of them I've ever sold, have been to people who have asked me. It was their idea, they wanted to spend the money. I don't try to sell them like I sell dances. I'll do a dance for (almost) anyone, I'm yet to say no to someone for a lap dance in all my 20 months of doing this. The 3 rooms have been to 2 young, hot kids who have money, and a 35 year old who just wanted to talk. The kids are ones with that bad girl fantasy, because I prolly wouldn't cross paths with them in public. It starts with a dance or two, then turns into an hour or 2 1/2 of rooms. I love being able to meet these kids and hang out. They think I'm faking wanting to spend the time with them and have some drinks, but it's a much better treat. I don't have to lower my standards to force sell them on gross/old dudes, that wouldn't want to talk to some mouthy, tattooed broad anyways. I made $865 that night. The dancer that drove me home told me the story of her regular buying her an $11,000 Xterra. It had a smashed bumper from her texting and driving. I had to tell her she had a green light twice, because she was busy texting.
Sunday was my last night of work. My sister was making an impromptu 15 hour road trip from Miami Beach to see me for Halloween day then see me off on Tuesday. We have 'our things we go do' when we're both in NOLA, and I love her to death. At work, I sold 3 dances to a party of 6, who totally dug me. Another for a hot girl dressed as Daphne from Scooby Doo. Then did my last fire show, and got some photos taken from it for the website. Fiona & Athena were in the $4000 room with a man, and I kept sneaking in, chatting and drinking their Krug White Label and Pierre Jouet. After I did one last dance for another hot chick with huge boobs, Michel flagged me down. "They bought you for an hour, here's $500 Barely bucks." (paper money redeemable for cash at check-out) The $4000 room had added me. YES! I went and hung with Fiona, Athena and Tony from Eastern Oregon, we made out way through another 4 bottles of champagne, some crappy breakfast delivery and did a mini-fire show for them in the room, with just some torches. "Hey Michel, can I do fire in here?" "Sure, just don't burn the building down". Afterwards Josh asked me to do one more torch show on VIP upstairs after they had brought the after hours customers up there. I sold one more dance, and left with another $860. Our adorable cocktail waitress dropped me off at home. She was the best confidence booster all week, and made me feel like I was really cool.
I napped on the couch until my sister arrived at 9am. We hadn't seen each other since Aug. of 2010, in New Orleans. We chatted for a bit and went to bed. I missed the crap out of her. In the morning we went to eat delicious food at Cochon with Kenny, Fiona and friends. The 4 of us hadn't been together in over 6 years. We stopped by Fifi Mahony's and I bought 2 new wigs, 1 blonde wig and 1 auburn, with purple and burgundy low lights. Look out St. Louis, I'm blonde now, bitches! I got dropped off for my massive Fleur de Lis knee tattoo done by Lester at ELT. Later I dressed up as Dr. Rockzo and ran around the Quarter and Frenchman until a 5 am bedtime. Earlier in the day, I had stopped by the club and asked if I could come in and do one last fire set at 1:30 am for my 3 friends, sister included, that hadn't seen me perform before. It was no problem, as I was on "I can do whatever I want" status. I guess nightly fire shows, and making the club $2,000 in dances and rooms will do that. We all rolled in about 1am, I changed into Freddie Mercury and did my Queen set. They flipped out, I was so happy that my sister loved it. It's really important to me that she thinks I'm awesome, as a former dancer herself. Now if only I could get my mom to see me do my thang...
On Tuesday we went to Port of Call for super alcoholic Monsoons' and then off to the airport all buzzed, I went.
I saw all the people I love who live in that city, made my dollar goal and had an amazing vacation. I love my trips so much because they're so different than dancing at home. I wrote some of this blog at one of my clubs from 3pm - 9pm (mid shift, only ones I can get mostly) where there are close to 20 males filling the bar at close to 5pm on a Wednesday. If I left the dressing room and ask every one of them for a dance, they would all say no. They can only afford their cheap drinks. It doesn't even occur to them that they need to tip us, or even draw away from their conversations to pay attention to the fact this is a strip club. 90% of clubs in this city are like this. To keep my mood stable I treat dancing here like play time. I can hone my pole skills being on stage 10-14 times a shift, instead of 4-6. There isn't an emphasis on 'rack interactions' with customers like in STL & NOLA. I barely have time to do pole tricks because I'm busy putting my boobs in people faces and doing that move where you hook their neck with your ankle and shove their face in your but-thigh area. They won't tip you, if you don't do these things there. In PDX they have to tip you, a measly $1 a song. I'm finding it difficult to get back into the groove here. I'm doing 3 times the work on stage to show my vag for 1/10th of the money.
I sure could use another hot, rich lawyer & one of those $1,600 Veuve Rose' rooms right about now.
Lark will be back in St. Louis at Hustler Club Nov. 9th-13th. Please keep voting for her in the PDX Strippes for 'Most Beautiful Face' until Nov 25th.
